Poisoned Dreams and a Cheese Curl Conflagration

Last night I dreamed that Shawn and I were in the backyard foraging for weeds. We were planning to eat them. Problem was, Shawn was being a diligent, basket-carrying weed collector, while I was eating (raw and dusty) every piece of greenery I laid my eyes on. Until, of course, I polished off an entire stalk of oleander which, as soon as my tongue began to tingle, Shawn reminded me was one of the most toxic plants in the world . . . .

But dreams are mercifully brief when death is imminent, so I promptly woke up with nothing more serious than an arid mouth.

The rest of my day, though, copycatted my dream. No, I didn't surrender to the allure of lethal vegetation, but I did eat myself silly. Actually, it's not so much that I ate massive amounts of food, but that the food choices I made were decidedly unconventional.

My morning dawned on an almond milk latte with two shots of espresso and a tablespoon of powdered Mexican chocolate. So far so good. But then, within the hour, I decided that the caffeine I'd already ingested was lonely and needed--oh--another pot of coffee.

Whilst java fogged, I reasoned that a cereal bowl filled with veggie chips amounted to a near-perfect breakfast sequel. (My first breakfast was a fruit 'n' nut bar with a side of hot cereal).

You see how this is going. By midday, I'd lunched on a couple of gluten-free vegan pizza slices and a handful of hot Cheetos. And then, to douse the conflagration of cheese curls in my gut, I paired a dark chocolate Kit Kat bar with a ten-ounce cup of carrot juice. I think there were some grapes in there somewhere too. Probably next to my second (but comparatively modest) helping of veggie chips. Dinner was equally embellished.

I don't know that there's a bigger lesson to be learned from my day of off-beat gastronomical activities. I'm not typically an emotional eater, so I don't fear I'm headed down some food-lined road to ruin. But I reckon that if there is something to be surmised here it is this: dreams really can come true. Especially when you've got a pantry filled with mismatched snacks.